Tinsel, tensions & new traditions – When Christmas and family law collide

With Christmas and the festive break just around the corner, most of us are juggling busy diaries, making plans for the big day and buying another pair of socks for Uncle Bill! However, for some families, Christmas comes with a new set of challenges. In this blog, I explore some of those challenges and how the Family Team at Cripps can help you navigate them and plan into the New Year.

Co-parenting at Christmas

Navigating Christmas can be challenging for separating parents.

So, what should you think about ahead of Christmas to help reduce conflict and help everyone adjust to what this ‘new’ Christmas may be? Below are some practical insights that may help you and your family manage the festive season:

1. Plan early (and preferably in writing!). The earlier you can plan the arrangements for the festive period, the better. Be as specific as possible with your plans – what time is pick up, where will the pick up be from, who will do the pick up, where will the children be having dinner? Have something in writing which confirms the arrangements, whether an email chain or a shared calendar – this can help prevent misunderstandings on the day.
2. There is no ‘one size fits all’. The day will look different for every family. For example, you could have a shared Christmas Day (where the day is split between the parents) or you could have split days (Christmas Day with Dad and Boxing Day with Mum). You need to think about what will work for your family – take into account the practicalities of your proposals and to some extent, consider the traditions your children have enjoyed over the years.
3. Try to manage communications separately. Naturally, emotions are heightened at Christmas. And where emotions are high, things are often said that would otherwise remain unvoiced. If possible, take a break from the situation – walk away, take a breath and return to the conversation. If your situation is too high-conflict, think about alternative ways to contact – whether by message or email, or via one of the many co-parenting apps specifically designed for separating parents.
4. Seek support early if you are struggling to agree. Our Family Team are experts in navigating child arrangements and our early advice can help you come to a practical and child-focussed agreement before the conflict escalates. If you need tailored advice about arrangements for your children, Cripps can help you navigate the process with clarity and confidence.

Separating after Christmas

Christmas will also see a lot of us spending more time together as a family. The festive period can intensify existing tensions and many families reach the New Year feeling that change is unavoidable.

If you are dealing with a separation in the New Year, it is natural to feel overwhelmed. Cripps can help you adapt to those new circumstances – whether that is guiding you through the process to end a relationship or marriage, or making new arrangements for your children. We can provide you with support during that emotionally charged time and help steer you through the unknown.

New beginnings

Finally, some couples are starting out on their journey together at Christmas time with December being one of the busiest months for proposals in the UK.

Alongside the celebrations, it is sensible to take a moment to think about the practicalities of the merging of two lives. Our Family Team can help you understand how a future marriage may impact your financial arrangements and provide you with support and guidance about nuptial agreements. My colleague, Louisa, provides some helpful tips for you to consider in Before you say ‘I do’: Why legal clarity matters when entering into a marriage or civil partnership.

How we can help

If you have any questions or concerns as to how your family may be impacted by Christmas, please contact our Family Team.